The Hungry Pelican 

Exploring Creation Through the Lens of Faith and Creative Writing

March 22, 2020

You don’t need to be told that everything is about the coronavirus. On the news, social media, standing in line at the grocery store, social distancing, hand sanitizer, toilet paper shortages, kids home from school, parents home from work, the market hitting new and newer lows, the coronavirus is between your teeth and no amount of flossing’s going get rid of it. And that is why it’s called a pandemic.

     It is curious to see who emails me about the virus. They all want to tell me steps they’ve taken to protect me—they all want to be helpful. FedEx told me they no longer require signatures for most packages. My bank sent me an email talking about drive-thru banking. An exercise fitness thing I get is telling me how to avoid germs at the grocery store. A car dealer (can you believe it?) emailed me about corona, as did an alumni group from a university, the cable company, a charity group in Africa, my natural gas supplier, and on and on I could go.

     Now, I don’t want t...

March 14, 2020

I don’t know where I saw it first. Facebook or Instagram or maybe it was in a newspaper, but I saw a boat run aground at Oregon Inlet. I knew it had to be photographed. This is how I know there is, however small, something of a true photographer in me: I didn’t see the boat in the picture, I saw the boat as I would photograph it. For an artist, once a vision like that has been captured in the mind, it must be coerced into this world. And in this way, an artist and a disciple of a religious tradition are much the same. The vision is an epiphany, something transcendent grasped in the mind demanding investigation, like a moth singed by the flicker of a candle returning again and again until it is consumed with light. God’s imagination and the muse’s provocations speak with the same charge, the same voice. It is a mystical experience every bit as dramatic and miraculous as a vision from Patmos or by the river Chebar, where the heavens were opened, and Ezekiel saw visions of God.

Angela and...

February 29, 2020

In the last couple of months, I’ve been to two war reenactments. Being in North Carolina, clearly one of them was a Civil War reenactment. The other was a Revolutionary War reenactment. At both of them, folks dressed in costumes. Some were reenacting musicians, doctors or pharmacists, culinary artist, tailors, and many other trade and craft folks from their respective periods. Mostly, though, the soldiers and rifles, knives and swords and bayonets caught the most attention. They fired their guns and made cannons go kaboom.

     Why would people drive from all over to stage such a ceremonious display of pretend violence? Why do people go and watch? And most curiously, what about these folks drawn to put on these events? Why do they do it?

     Having talked with many of the reenactors, it is clear most of them are truly history buffs. Some of them are more than historical enthusiast; they are teachers, collectors, professors, and authors. Others have traced family ancestry...

February 21, 2020

Faithful readers of The Hungry Pelican will have surely noted by now that I haven’t been so faithful about writing. Well, the good news is that my absence cannot be attributed to a drunken, suicidal binge that left me hospitalized or otherwise incapacitated. The truth is, I haven’t really felt like writing. I haven’t felt like forcing some sort of inspirational moment or event so I could write a blog. There’s nothing more exacerbating than forced spirituality. Forced spirituality is the birthplace of clichés and the graveyard of mindfulness. If it isn’t happening, it isn’t happening.

     (So, here’s a side thought. You want to know where all this personal Lord and Savior stuff came from? This Jesus is my best friend, this cotton candy Jesus stuff? It came from pastors getting up in the pulpit Sunday after Sunday with nothing meaningful to say; so, they invented these tropes through sheer spiritual boredom and cut their weekly workload in half. Now these pastors just rattle off one clic...

October 26, 2019

For all the outdoor activities I do, camping, hiking, living on a deserted island for days by myself, I’ve never really considered myself an outdoorsy person. Okay, I tend to favor outdoor clothing, and I do shop at REI; I display my lifetime saltwater fishing license on Beans (my truck) because we should all hunt or gather some of our food, and I’ve got a bright orange hunter’s vest stowed behind the driver’s seat (not because I hunt but because I shoot butterflies or wildflowers in game lands). 

     But really, I’m an indoor person: plucking away on my laptop, looking up words and spellings and grammatical rules, which I usually break or get wrong anyway, reading long-dead mystics and other susurrating voices. Legs kicked up on the desk, my second cup of cinnamon-sprinkled caffeine steaming on my distressed coffee stand, window blinds opened, watching joggers, walkers, and school buses go by: right there, that is my perfect day. Why is it, then, that last week I packed up my tent and...

October 8, 2019

Last week, I went to this zoo that’s not exactly a zoo. It’s a place called Tiger World. While I don’t know much about it, Tiger World bills itself as a preserve or refuge for various animals. Some of the animals have found their way to Tiger World through zoo closings or downsizes or, and, apparently this is true, (well, maybe it’s true,) some people keep exotic pets until the landlord or the neighborhood says Tigger and Mufasa have to go. 

     At any rate, it made for a good opportunity to get some unique pictures. At first, I was disappointed. The animals were all caged. (Had I been expecting them to be uncaged?) But it was worse. Many of the animal cages were separated from the viewers by a second fence several feet away from the cage. They were caged inside of a cage. The more I looked at the animals and the cages, it became apparent that some animals were caged more than others. 

     Take the tiger pacing back and forth, about to explode with frustra...

September 14, 2019

I don’t want to give you a news report, so suffice it to say, Dorian destroyed the Bahamas. Who didn’t ask where God was? Who dying underneath a pile of rubble didn’t cry out for God’s help? In those last bits of lucid consciousness, who didn’t feel the release of God’s clasp and the resignation of life to naught?  

     A windstorm arose on the sea, so great that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but [Jesus] was asleep.

     Once the storm started moving again and it was determined that Alabama wasn’t ever going to hit Alabama, Angela and I started to do our storm-prep work. Buy water, buy can goods, get batteries, and an extra propane tank. With the unending aftermath of Florence still fresh on our minds, the cone of uncertainty felt fated to run railroad through our community, again. After all, we had just seen what it did to the Bahamas. Could we take it again?

     Angela decided she would shelter-in-place at the hospital where she...

August 9, 2019

When you’re copping off heads, it helps to have a serrated knife. I didn’t, so I more or less mashed my fillet knife through fish bones on the top of a flipped-over bucket I had gotten from Lowes. The weather was

cool for late July. The Atlantic was unwinding a low tide. The only thing to see up or down the beach were mirages.

     I had caught a couple of mullets and blues in the surf, but they didn’t satisfy my itch. I wanted a big fish, something larger, much larger. I wanted something I could fight. Something I could battle. A conquest. So, I started chopping off fish heads.

     I had finally done it. For years, at least as long as I’ve had Beans (my 4-wheel-drive truck), I’ve wanted to camp

on the South Core Banks. I had finally arrived, scooting down the single, sand path, surrounded by sea oats, egrets, ibises, roped-off turtle nest, and shells. South Core is a part of the Cape Lookout National Seashore. South west of Ocracoke, due east of Morehea...

July 29, 2019

Starting photography, I found, was much like fishing. It started simple enough: a good experience, surpassed expectations, the organic feel–an intuitive practice revealing purpose and potential at once. If it (fishing, photography, or whatever) stirs latent proclivities, you won’t take long to become a cash-strapped student labored with particulars and new Facebook groups.

    When that first mackerel doubled over my fishing pole, nearly catapulting my fishing cart off the pier, time stopped. My vision narrowed. Only this fish and I existed. A concretized-transcendent affair, at once serendipitous and designed. Rapturing. Rapturing, I say again so you will get how singularly absorbed and concentrated I was.

    In that moment, I knew why the fight lengthened seconds to minutes. The very meaning of life was drawn out, the struggle for it, the conflict of it. One life to sustain another. The fight was grandiose and cosmic. At the same time, though, the fish’s role, my role,...

July 12, 2019

Do you remember the first time you stood ankle deep in the ocean before dawn? The sinking feeling and splash of vertigo hypnotized as you watched an infinitely speckled sky fade into a single star? Or the time goosebumps crawled on your skin as strings softly yielded to a horn’s elegiac solo? Or that time you went to the Glacier National Park or Machu Picchu or some other breathtaking view you had only seen in travel magazines and National Geographic: Do you remember that sense of awe? Shocked and strangely gratified by your tininess, your splendid insignificance. The flash of comprehension, the joy of existence reimagined. You liaised in emergence, that half-glimpse into the eternal. You recognized your soul tethered to a body, a body scaffolded by particles of dust and dirt. You returned home and looked through an old photo album as you would look through a recursive reflection.

     Since Trump took office, I haven’t felt the slightest inclination to visit this country’s capital. So...

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